My Book Pitch to Agents: Before and After

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As I mentioned in last week’s post, I went to NYC this past summer to attend my first-ever writing conference and pitch my book to agents.

Basically, I willingly put myself through introvert hell for the sake of my book baby.

It was so worth it, and I learned so much—including how to pitch to agents. I thought I knew how. I read countless articles and researched other people’s pitches and queries. But going to a conference, hearing agents talk about the dos and the don’ts of pitches, and practicing and revising with fellow writers prepared me more than any online article.

There are some benefits to socializing, its seems.

Anyway, as promised, here is a before and after of my pitch. This transformation led me to get 4 requests and 1 referral!


Before:

After residence life effs up a lonely freshman’s room assignment, CORA LI learns college is like foster care. There’s incompetent adults, bitchy peers, and no place for her to call home.

My young adult contemporary SLEEPING AROUND is complete at 73k words.

Eighteen-year-old Cora has never belonged—not with her unknown parents in Taiwan or her past thirteen foster homes. But now that she’s been accepted to Borns College, she hopes she’s finally found her place. She’s supposed to live in Harmony Hall with the other freshman music majors, make good grades, and sit first chair violinist.

She’s not supposed to show up on move-in day without a room and rejected from the music program. So when Res Life shoves her in a temporary room, and her new roommate throws her out, Cora scrambles to keep hold of her dream to belong.

Her plummeting grades threaten to put her on academic probation. But despite her friendship fall-outs, a complicated romance, and roomlessness, Cora refuses to be another foster care statistic.

SLEEPING AROUND is Giles’ Girls Like Us meets Pitch Perfect via Han’s To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before.


After:

My young adult contemporary SLEEPING AROUND is about a foster-care escapee searching to belong. Eighteen-year-old freshman violinist CORA LI has never belonged—not with her unknown parents in Taiwan or at her past eleven foster homes. But she must belong at Borns College. Yet when reslife effs up her room assignment and shoves her into a temporary triple, one of her new roommates throws her out. Cora begins sleeping around campus—from air mattresses to drainage tunnels—waiting for an open room. Until then, her friendship fallouts, messy romances, and plummeting grades threaten to keep her from her dream to belong.

SLEEPING AROUND is 73k words. Fans of To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before will connect with the youthful narrator in this Girls Like Us meets Pitch Perfect story. Does this sound like a novel you would represent?


Punchier, right? Let me know in the comments if you have any questions about writing a pitch or query! Do you like my “after” pitch better?

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